1. Remember, there is no way you can look as bad as that person on your drivers license.
2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.
3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever.
Never let the brain idle. " An idle mind is the devil's workshop."
And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.
4. Enjoy the simple things.
5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on.
The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.
7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music,
plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.
8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it.
If it is unstable, improve it.
If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.
9. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.
10. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Saturday, June 12, 2010
A grandmother is a babysitter who watches the kids instead
of the television.. ~Author Unknown
Never have children, only grandchildren. ~Gore Vidal
Becoming a grandmother is wonderful. One moment you're just
a mother. The next you are all-wise and prehistoric. ~Pam Brown
Grandchildren don't stay young forever, which is good because
Grandfathers have only so many horsy rides in them. ~Gene Perret
When grandparents enter the door, discipline flies out the window. ~Ogden Nash
Grandma always made you feel she had been waiting to see just
you all day and now the day was complete. ~ Marcy DeMaree
Grandmas never run out of hugs or cookies. ~Author unknown
Grandmas hold our tiny hands for just a little while, but our hearts forever. ~Author Unknown
If I had known how wonderful it would be to have grandchildren, I'd have had them first. ~Lois Wyse
My grandkids believe I'm the oldest thing in the world. And after two or three hours with them,
I believe it, too. ~Gene Perret
If becoming a grandmother was only a matter of choice, I should
advise every one of you straight away to become one.
There is no fun for old people like it! ~Hannah Whithall Smith
It's such a grand thing to be a mother of a mother - that's why the
world calls her grandmother. ~Author Unknown
Grandchildren are God's way of compensating us for growing old. ~Mary H. Waldrip
You do not really understand something unless you can explain
it to your grandmother. ~Proverb
An hour with your grandchildren can make you feel young again.
Anything longer than that, and you start to age quickly. ~Gene Perret
The best baby-sitters, of course, are the baby's grandparents.
You feel completely comfortable entrusting your baby to them for long
periods, which is why most grandparents flee to Florida ~Dave Barry
I wish I had the energy that my grandchildren have - if only for self-defense. ~Gene Perret
Grandmother-grandchild relationships are simple
Grandmas are short on criticism and long on love. ~Author Unknown
Nobody can do for little children what grandparents do Grandparents sort of sprinkle stardust over the lives of little children. ~Alex Haley
of the television.. ~Author Unknown
Never have children, only grandchildren. ~Gore Vidal
Becoming a grandmother is wonderful. One moment you're just
a mother. The next you are all-wise and prehistoric. ~Pam Brown
Grandchildren don't stay young forever, which is good because
Grandfathers have only so many horsy rides in them. ~Gene Perret
When grandparents enter the door, discipline flies out the window. ~Ogden Nash
Grandma always made you feel she had been waiting to see just
you all day and now the day was complete. ~ Marcy DeMaree
Grandmas never run out of hugs or cookies. ~Author unknown
Grandmas hold our tiny hands for just a little while, but our hearts forever. ~Author Unknown
If I had known how wonderful it would be to have grandchildren, I'd have had them first. ~Lois Wyse
My grandkids believe I'm the oldest thing in the world. And after two or three hours with them,
I believe it, too. ~Gene Perret
If becoming a grandmother was only a matter of choice, I should
advise every one of you straight away to become one.
There is no fun for old people like it! ~Hannah Whithall Smith
It's such a grand thing to be a mother of a mother - that's why the
world calls her grandmother. ~Author Unknown
Grandchildren are God's way of compensating us for growing old. ~Mary H. Waldrip
You do not really understand something unless you can explain
it to your grandmother. ~Proverb
An hour with your grandchildren can make you feel young again.
Anything longer than that, and you start to age quickly. ~Gene Perret
The best baby-sitters, of course, are the baby's grandparents.
You feel completely comfortable entrusting your baby to them for long
periods, which is why most grandparents flee to Florida ~Dave Barry
I wish I had the energy that my grandchildren have - if only for self-defense. ~Gene Perret
Grandmother-grandchild relationships are simple
Grandmas are short on criticism and long on love. ~Author Unknown
Nobody can do for little children what grandparents do Grandparents sort of sprinkle stardust over the lives of little children. ~Alex Haley
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Senior Center
HYPNOTIST AT THE SENIOR CENTER
It was entertainment night at the Senior Center. Claude the hypnotist exclaimed: 'I'm here to put you into a trance; I intend to hypnotize each and every member of the audience.'
The excitement was almost electric as Claude withdrew a beautiful antique pocket watch from his coat. 'I want you each to keep your eye on this antique watch. It's a very special watch. It's been in my family for six generations.' He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting, 'Watch the watch, watch the watch, and watch the watch...'
The crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light gleaming off its polished surface. Hundreds of pairs of eyes followed the swaying watch, until suddenly it slipped from the hypnotist's fingers and fell to the floor, breaking into a hundred pieces.
'SHIT!' said the Hypnotist.
It took three days to clean up the Senior Center.
It was entertainment night at the Senior Center. Claude the hypnotist exclaimed: 'I'm here to put you into a trance; I intend to hypnotize each and every member of the audience.'
The excitement was almost electric as Claude withdrew a beautiful antique pocket watch from his coat. 'I want you each to keep your eye on this antique watch. It's a very special watch. It's been in my family for six generations.' He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting, 'Watch the watch, watch the watch, and watch the watch...'
The crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light gleaming off its polished surface. Hundreds of pairs of eyes followed the swaying watch, until suddenly it slipped from the hypnotist's fingers and fell to the floor, breaking into a hundred pieces.
'SHIT!' said the Hypnotist.
It took three days to clean up the Senior Center.
Did I read that sign right?
DID I READ THAT SIGN RIGHT?
On Restroom Door:
TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW
In a Laundromat:
AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT
In a Memphis department store:
BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS
In an office:
WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN
In an office:
AFTER COFFEE BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE COFFEE POT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD
Outside a second hand shop:
WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?
Notice in health food shop window:
CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS
Spotted in a safari park:
ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR
Seen during a conference:
FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR
Notice in a farmer's field:
THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES.
Message on a leaflet:
IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL YOU HOW TO GET LESSONS
On a repair shop door:
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)
On Restroom Door:
TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW
In a Laundromat:
AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT
In a Memphis department store:
BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS
In an office:
WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN
In an office:
AFTER COFFEE BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE COFFEE POT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD
Outside a second hand shop:
WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?
Notice in health food shop window:
CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS
Spotted in a safari park:
ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR
Seen during a conference:
FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR
Notice in a farmer's field:
THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES.
Message on a leaflet:
IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL YOU HOW TO GET LESSONS
On a repair shop door:
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)
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